First the unseasonable thunderstorms and tornado watches interfered with posting the rest of my blog about “Clutter.” Well. No one can do anything about the weather, as we all know. So I made plans to complete the rest of the zodiac, Libra through Pisces, with the light-hearted bits and pieces you, dear readers, have come to expect and presumably, enjoy.
Then – nothing. No internet service. Towards the end of a very long, frustrating morning, I received word from the resident geek explaining the situation. “A regional outage across several states” had rendered my blog lifeless. No artificial respiration could bring it back to life until the whole system-schmystem was repaired. The outdoor thermometer wasn’t the only thing sizzling that day. Luckily I, Madame Zombra, do not suffer from high blood pressure or ulcers – yet. But I must stop vehemently complaining and get back to the blog. Herewith, Clutter, Part II:
Libra: September 23-October 22
What? Throw out my collection of old Valentine’s Day heart-shaped boxes? What kind of an unsentimental monster are you? Yes, the house is cluttered. I’ve got too much to do to spend days vacuuming, cleaning, washing. If one of us made better money we could hire all that out. What? A tie? No one cares what you wear nowadays.
Scorpio: October 23-November 21
I’ll keep my books on the occult as long as I have a use for them. No, I don’t believe in astrology. Fate is what it is. If I’m being honest, there isn’t much in your closet that really looks good on you. There’s nothing but drivel on TV. I wouldn’t mind having a pet wolf, but people are so paranoid. Yes, my wardrobe is all black. Jobs did it first.
Sagittarius: November 22-December 21
OMG the dishwasher just belched suds into the kitchen floor – what do you mean, you can’t use dish soap in it? What does it use, I’d like to know. No, I’m not going to get rid of my old sports equipment. I can sell it for quite a bit of money. Okay, okay, I’ll go rent a storage space. Got some boxes I can use? And tape? And a marker?
Capricorn: December 22-January 19
I’m not getting rid of any of Auntie Grizelda’s antiques until I’ve had them appraised. I was her favorite nephew and she promised she’d set me up in the antique business when she passed on. Put that down; Black Jack chewing gum in the wrapper is indeed a collector’s item. Please go away and let me deal with this.
Aquarius: January 20-February 18
Yeah, the dumpster outside is mine for the weekend, anyway. Why? Did you want to put stuff in it too? No, I’m not keeping much; it just weighs me down when I backpack. If you want something, speak up. I have no idea what that is, but you can have it if you’ll just take it home. I’m going to shovel out the kitchen next.
Pisces: February 19-March 20
Oh, this is painful. So many memories connected with every piece in this room – and seventeen more rooms besides this one. What? I should start throwing things away? And why would I do that? My memories are precious to me; each piece in this room has a story. Yes, I already have three storage units rented. So?
Next week hopefully everything will align correctly and work posted when it’s expected to be. Apologies from your favorite ancient astrologer.
#MadameZombra
Madame Z. I think you kicked clutter’s fanny—and the butts of the weather, the internet, and anything else getting in the way of your message.
You da’ champ!